less_retarded_wiki

Work

Work is a glorification of slavery.

Work, better known as slavery, is an unpleasant effort which one is required or forced to suffer, such as harvesting crops or debugging computer programs. Work hurts living beings and takes away the meaning of their lives, it destroys their bodies and minds. Work makes us slaves, it wastes our lives and is among the major causes of suicides -- many consider it better to die than to work. One of the main goals of civilization is to eliminate any need for work, i.e. create machines that will do all the work for humans (see automation). Work is for the machine, life and art are for the living being.

Fun fact: the Spanish (also Portuguese etc.) word for work, "trabajo", comes from tripalium, a device made of three sticks used to force slaves to work. { Thanks to my friend who told me about this <3 ~drummyfish }

While good society tries to eliminate work, capitalism aims for the opposite, i.e. artificially creating bullshit jobs and bullshit needs so as to keep everyone enslaved to the system. Fortunately movements such as the antiwork movement try to oppose this, however masses have already been brainwashed to be hostile to such movements and instead demand their own enslavement.

We see it as essential to start educating people about the issue as well as starting to eliminate jobs immediately with things such as automation and universal basic income.

                      your best years
                    ____________________
                   /                    \
  |------|----------------|-------------------------------------------------|------|

  ^        ^ school:        ^ job:                                          ^      ^ retirement:
  here      - slavery drill  - no free time                                 here    - your reward!
  you       - indoctrination - no time for family                           you     - enjoy free time!
  are       - brainwashing   - constant stress                              die     - if you happen to
  born      - bullying       - shut up and do what you hate                           be alive, you're
            - stress         - barely get by                                          in coma
            - get ready for  - can't rest, eat pills if tired
              what's coming  - get up early, come back late

Official plan of you "freedom" according to a capitalist.

Slavery has NOT been abolished. On the contrary, more people than ever are enslaved, and the conditions don't much differ from those of slaves in older times -- they are sometimes even worse. How is it so? Well, firstly slavery back then wasn't as bad as you see in the movies (just like for example a typical day of a cop is much different from what you'll see in a movie, it's a fucking movie) where you usually see black men whipped to row ships or slaves dragging stones to the pyramids while being constantly whipped until falling dead from exhaustion -- indeed that did happen, as it still happens today here and there, but it wasn't so common, slaves were often owned by a family and were part of it. Yes, they were owned, but your dog is also owned by you, and you still love it and take good care of it, don't you? The slave was a worker but many times had a good relationship with his master, just as you can have a good relationship with your boss (who by the way also owns you, this ownership was just renamed to a "work contract"); the master didn't take pleasure in torturing the slave or overworking him to death for fun, he wanted to keep him in good shape and happy so that he would live long and do work for him. The slave might have had a relatively good life -- if he could read and write he might have been a transcriber or teacher of the master's children; Diogenes for example was a wise slave who had great respect of his master. A slave could many times save up money and buy his freedom in a few years if he desired. This is practically the same as a work contract: yes, you can TECHNICALLY cancel your work contract, but then you won't get food for living, so de facto you are in exact same situation -- you must keep saving money to be able to buy your freedom, there is absolutely zero difference except for using different words. Today's propaganda paints historical slavery as much worse so as to make seem today's slavery not so bad -- yes, it was bad back then but it is possibly even worse today (12 or 14 hour shifts, working whole year round, repetitive psychologically draining work in a catacomb under constant camera surveillance, ...) -- the only changes that we made are just cosmetic: for example we don't call slave masters masters but managers or bosses, your employer still owns you through your work contract (which again you technically "may quit", but won't because you need money, or because you would simply have to go to another slave master who will treat you exactly the same), we (at least in the first world) don't use DIRECT physical force (though we do use indirect one, e.g. police punishing homeless thieves who HAVE TO steal in order to survive without working) on people anymore but we use a much more effective and cruel psychological, economical and social pressure (it works just as well and keeps the slave in better physical shape, and we can call it "progress"), we no longer physically chain people in place because we can tie people down by holding their families hostage or making them dependent on drugs, and we can track down any individual no matter where he goes, physical chain is not needed anymore, another cosmetic change we call "progress". People commit more suicides from overworking than ever, that alone says something. Many modern capitalists put people under much worse conditions than old slavemasters, for example at one point Henry Ford allowed his workers only 10 minutes for lunch -- that's as fucked up as it gets. If you think slavery doesn't exist, see for example the documentary Shipbreakers in which you'll see today's people -- men, women and children -- in India in conditions as miserable as you could ever image, being forced to dismantle ships all day long just to earn a few dimes for food, breathing toxic fumes, getting cancer and going blind, dying on daily basis from no work safety, living in small huts on beaches soaked with toxic chemical poison. It's just a tip of the iceberg, and it is today's world.

Stop working right now! Society has brainwashed you into constantly "planning for retirement", to keep postponing living for "later", to sacrifice the best years of your life, your whole life -- the only life you will ever have -- to do something you hate from your heart, to sacrifice time you could spend with your loved ones, by helping others, by creating art of love. This is called The Great Trap. You are constantly made to chase something and never just live -- you are working hard to graduate, then to pass exams in University, then to defend your thesis, then to get a job, then to get a promotion, then to pay off your mortgage, and suddenly you are 70 and your life is gone. Do not waste your life like this, start living right now.

Friendly reminder that even the agricultural peasant only used to slave during summer, in the winter he just chilled and ate the food he farmed in the summer. Gorillas sleep 12 hours a day and the rest they spend having fun, they don't work at all. Capitalism made so much "progress" that everyone is now a slave all year round :-] Even in feudalist times the peasants were obliged to donate just PART of their work to the overlord leech, the rest of time they spent working on their own fields -- today you donate practically 100% time to your slavemaster, you own nothing, you have no practically usable skill, you spend 100% time in your job and just go home to sleep and take a shower, you live in rented flat, you watch rented movies, you use rented software, you're renting your digital devices (you have to replace them every year or so because they stop working), you take drugs to make you not suffer a mental breakdown from it and you probably call this historically unprecedented freedom.

How To Avoid Work

{ Some readers expressed sadness over the fact that many methods here don't really work in their respective countries (probably USA and/or third world like Mexico or India -- isn't it funny we group USA and third world together?). Many methods recorded here rely on a society that is socially advanced to the degree that it takes care of the weak, which are typically for example post "socialist" countries, Scandinavian countries and so on. It is unfortunately true that some other countries remain just a technologically advanced jungle -- in a jungle there is no easy recipe for survival, only fight or death. In a jungle people will let you happily die walking by, they won't share food even if they have enough to share etc. Still there is hope: there may be specifics of the country you live in that may be exploited -- maybe linked to tourism, climate, weird laws etc. -- almost every system can be hacked, but you will have to do your own research to discover them, or at the very least there exists the option to flee the country and go somewhere better as a last resort. ~drummyfish }

For lawyer cunts: we officially DO NOT ADVISE any illegal methods mentioned here. However unofficially we highly welcome them. Also for lawyers: fuck you. Here are some ways in which it might IN THEORY be possible to avoid work:

• Becoming as independent as possible: living frugally, stopping consuming, using old technology, growing own food, making one's electricity etc. Even if one needs some money, needing less is always better, as one can work less.
• Just saying fuck you to any work lol: fuck everything YOLO style can be fun, just stop doing anything, go beg for money. You'll probably lose any social security such as healthcare and old age pension, but you may still get some minimum life support, and if you are extremely sick just lay down in front of main hospital entrance, they'll probably have to save your life even without health insurance. Even if not, living fewer years in freedom is probably better than living longer in slavery.
• Saving money: obviously, saving a lot of money makes one able to retire soon. Watch out for inflation that destroys savings, it's nice to put some part of it e.g. in gold so that it keeps the value.
• Begging: in some regions beggars make very good money, sometimes even more than a regular salary. Trying to look like a "street artist" may help, however just asking people NICELY for money will probably work in bigger cities where people can afford the expense. Again, be NICE, don't smell or look disgusting, DO NOT be drunk or smell by alcohol, say you need it for food or accommodation, don't fight with people who shittalk you, just politely leave and ask someone else. Find tricks that work (e.g. asking a couple may be more successful as the guy won't want to seem like a greedy bastard in front of the lady). Watch out for for places where this may be illegal. Change your spots or even cities often so that you don't become a annoying to the degree that someone would want to get you removed.
• Some professions come with long holidays, typically e.g. teachers get about two months off each year, so you can try to find something like this. Also some seasonal work and so on. In some countries an employer is required to still pay you a portion of salary even if there is no work to be done and you have to stay at home -- you can strategically search for work in an industry that is going to stagnate.
• Getting a disability pension: if you are really disabled then you've already won, otherwise either fake it or bribe a doctor (e.g. with sex). As a desperate move a capitalist slave may even go as far as trying to cripple himself on purpose to avoid remaining slave for his whole life (so called self mutilation, a technique used by soldiers to avoid duty), however we can't downright recommend this as of course this can backfire in many ways. One possible way of doing so might be e.g. stopping eating and becoming anorexic (to many a whole life of freedom would be worth a few months of starving). On tubgurl image board one reader suggested the following: just keep shitting your pants -- no one will want to hire you plus they will judge you must be retarded. Another idea is to just stop talking altogether, not a single word to anyone, you will probably be labeled a severe autist.
• Striking as often as possible: going on strikes as often as it is possible over everything is cool, one gets a holiday and hurts the employing company.
• Faking sickness or getting sick on purpose: for an employee it is possible to pretend to be sick to avoid work, to bribe doctor or break one's leg on purpose to stay at home and leech the employer and state is a possibility (of course we don't advice you to hurt yourself, just saying it's possible). If one just keeps breaking his leg over and over to avoid work, they will also likely give him some mental disease diagnosis and a disability pension so that he can stay at home indefinitely.
• Leeching welfare/neetbux: it's a common practice to e.g. register at the employment office and then just take unemployment support. There are many other potential sources of state money, like the widow pension, money for children etc.
• Becoming caretaker of a relative: in some countries you can become a caretaker for someone, usually a relative, who's old and/or disabled and needs a daily assistant, which will count as a job, you'll be getting some state money etc. So ask your grandma maybe, then just let her watch TV all day and do whatever you want with the free time.
• Convincing someone rich to just give you $$$: low chance of success, but it can't hurt to just sincerely ask some millionaires if they could maybe drop $100K or something, maybe when the guy will do it if he's drunk or high or just likes you.
• "Religious reasons": adopt or even invent a "religion" that says you cannot work, for example Judaism forbids any work on Saturday (Sabbath) -- you may be able to dig up a religion that has a lot of holy days on which you mustn't work. If your employer protests, absolutely rape him in court for racism and oppression, sue him for at least $1000000000, you're guaranteed to win this.
• Calling anonymous inspections: it can be fine to troll one's employers by calling for example hygienic workplace inspections, one may for example call that he saw they mix in shit into food, that there are rats running around, that employees masturbate in workplace and so on. When inspection comes, workers may be left waiting and just relaxing or even staying at home, and if the inspection does find some violations (very likely), it may at least temporarily close the workplace, again winning a few days off for the slaves.
• Stealing from the rich: stealing stuff from supermarkets, offices etc. is nice (officially NOT ADVISED, but it's still very nice). It's also helping society. Do not steal from the poor.
• Getting a rich partner?: someone rich can just take care of you for sex and love, however it may be not worth it as rich people are often capitalists whom it's better to stay away from.
• Moving to some nice community that doesn't force work: the problem is actually finding such community, but maybe some hippie tent villages could be like that -- look up mutual aid networks. Multiple people living together can be an advantage, they may pool in money to pay the absolutely necessary bills like property tax -- this will spread the expenses over many people so that every member will have to pay just a very small amount per year. They may then use their land to establish a micro community that works on communist principles, making their own food etc.
• Going to jail: in some countries prisons are quite luxurious and once in jail you can just refuse to work as they cannot lock you up more. In jail you have shelter and food, i.e. already more than most people in a capitalist society. However watch out: for some crimes you may just get fined, not actually locked up, so it's good to study the law to know which crimes it's best to commit to safely get one to jail. Your inspiration may be David Hampson who repeatedly gets himself arrested by standing in the middle of the road and then just refuses to talk to anyone.
• Moving to area where disasters happen regularly, like some highly earthquake rich land, may allow one to just jump the humanitarian help. It's hard to keep businesses running under a volcano that erupts every other week, so you just run around from charity tent to another one, get food, free healthcare etc. It may also be a nice, adventurous life.
• US edition: suing the employer: If you're a woman, nowadays you can successfully sue anyone for rape, you don't even need evidence, making $1000000 shouldn't be a problem. A non-white can play it on racism, a "disabiled" man can play it on disability etc. However one mustn't hurt a fellow working class poorfag, it must be made so that the comapany or some rich manager pays. IN THEORY it is possible to plot with one's coworkers -- for example the coworkers on same positions talk to each other, reveal their pays to one another, then the one with lowest pay sues for discrimination and they split the profit. Etc.
• Becoming a prostitute (usually for women): it's easy money and you literally get paid for having sex. Unless you're real ugly it may be enough to just "work" like this for a few days in a month. With shit like OnlyFans you don't even have to actually have real sex or risk STDs, it's literally like godmode cheat for women.
• The gypsy way: making tons of children: gypsies managed to hack the system by just making 10, 15 or maybe 20 children -- not only you stay on maternal leave, but you can take financial support for every one of them. The genius of this method is that since CHILDREN ARE MAGICAL, the state HAS TO make sure children are properly cared for AND at the same time it's difficult (e.g. enraging to feminists but even just general public) and messy to separate children from their mother, SO as long as a woman is a mother of a non-adult child, she can just 100% refuse to work and the state has no other choice than throw money at her so that the children (and the mother along with them) are fine. So a woman just makes 2 or 3 children, then as they're reaching 18 she makes another and so on until old age. The only danger is in actually getting the children taken away, so a big stress is on NOT taking drugs, NOT drinking, NOT doing idiotic shit like beating the children, NOT whoring for more money and so on.
• Widow pension: sometimes there is a widow pension, so you can quickly marry someone who is dying, then you'll be forever getting free money.
• The feminist way: if you're a woman, you can sue a random millionaire for rape. This works every time, you can just make everything up, the guy will be forced to pay you a billion or two, no evidence needed, just cry in the court.
• Alcoholism: starting to drink heavily may remove your brain, but then suddenly you'll also be judged a "victim" of alcoholism, locked somewhere and probably won't have to work, so it may be worth it. You don't need brain to lead average life in 21st century.
• Getting EU (or similar) money on some bullshit -- if this was to be considered """fraud""", then we officially DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS (:D), but it is very nice if someone does it. This would require the hypothetical man to maybe do some small amount of "work", but he could just dig a lot of money for doing almost nothing, for example one may ask for money for some software project that looks like a 100K EUR 1 year project -- this would actually be true if you made the project the "normal" way (i.e. using bloat tech, hiring consultants, managers, lawyers and whatever), but you can just do the project in a simple, LRS way over the weekend alone, then enjoy a whole year off as well as your free money.
• Comfy homeless life. May be super cool if you for example just inherited family fortune, then you sell everything and just live super frugally, you won't even have to beg too much.
• Moving to jungle and becoming God of some primitive tribe. Just bring some magic electronic devices with you, show them soul stealing photos, take a gun and show them you are capable of magically killing at distance, show you can conjure fire from your hands with a lighter. Then just sit on the throne and let yourself be fed.
• Sucicide: obviously death solves all problems. TBH lying in ground is probably more comfy than being raped every day of the year for 120 years.
• For discovering other methods it might be useful to dig in similar topics such as avoiding military service. For example breathing cacao before the medical entry examination was a popular way to simulate lung disease in the past -- nowadays with better technology this may no longer work, but still at least useful hints and directions may be found this way.
• ...

Least Harmful Slaveries

See also making living.

Should you be so unlucky to find no way of out of slavery, don't despair, it's still possible to minimize your suffering as well as damage to society by choosing one of the least harmful "jobs". The less money you need, the more freedom of choice you get, the less stress, responsibility and working hours you'll have to suffer, so aim to minimize your spendings. Even if slavery is inevitable, personal freedom can still be increased by lowering one's dependence on the system so that eventually the slavery becomes a minor nuisance to suffer from time to time to get by. Here are some slaveries you may consider:

• janitor, cleaner: Next to zero responsibility and stress, a labor that keeps not only the toilet cleans but also your mind, after getting used to the routine one can easily think about one's projects during the work.
• interpreter: Ideal for those speaking uncommon and/or difficult language, simply paid for parroting what one hears. If you're smart, you can learn Japanese or Chinese in a few years with some dedication. Being a tourist guide can be comfy, you get enjoy fresh air and walks every day.
• animal caretaker: May be more emotionally and physically challenging, but also the more meaningful and admirable. Look for animal shelters, small farms etc.
• caring for old/disabled/retarded people: Like animal caretaker but with people, may require some qualification.
• night guard, chair sitter: Comfy, nobrainer job, a lot of times you're paid for simply staying awake at night and being alone, keeping an eye on someone's property, which normies find boring. If you're however one of the few who in fact crave nothing else than being left alone with a book, this is exactly what you want to search for.
• corpse cleaning, graveyard maintainer, ...: Most people don't want to do this, so a great deal of pay may come simply from the fact that you are WILLING to do it. Spending time with corpses is better than spending time with live people, which is a big advantage.
• leaflet distribution, mailman: Daily exercise and fresh air, probably not talking to anyone much. Be careful about big corporations though, their delivery jobs are hell! Find something very small, a remote village where you walk on foot from house to house and just throw stuff in mailboxes.
• teacher: Can be stressful, difficult and requires education and dedication, but may also be fulfilling and satisfying to the more extroverted guys. The main advantage is the long holidays! Ideal is probably a half time teaching at a university as dealing with young kids in elementary and high school is probably an incredible pain in the ass.
• prostitute: Typically for women, can be a pleasant way of making big bucks and subsequently having a lot of free time, but can be risky due to diseases, violence, mafia and law.
• charity organizations, non-profits: Again one of the more difficult and stressful options, but if an office work can't be avoided, then at least let it be something closer to ethical, non-corporate world.
• street artist: Earning money with live performance is much more ethically sane and healthy than supporting copyright and sitting on one's ass in front of a computer, plus you don't rely on distributors, recording studios, license lawyers, computers and other bullshit/bloat and middle men. Just you, your art and your audience in the most genuine connection. Fresh air is also an advantage, imagine just practicing what you love every day and people paying you for watching. This doesn't have to be just music, maybe you're a great painter, juggler, chess players or a "living statue", anything goes if the crowd appreciates it.
• human taxi: The kind of non-motorized taxis like rickshaws don't pollute air, don't require as much maintenance, licenses and all this crap, plus you are literally paid for working out. The issue is that this may only be viable in a bigger city with a lot of competition and stinky air.
• free software: Working with computers is actually discouraged, not only because of all the suicide inducing toxicity, but also because it generally ties one to a computer too much, considering that free time is nowadays also spent predominantly behind a computer. But should there be no other option, helping ethical computing is at lest the best that can be done.
• tutoring: Find retards who need tutoring to pass classes and just teach them. Advantage: girls may pay with sex :)
• some kinda work in churches: Like helping with maintenance, cleaning, gardening, whatever. Hopefully priests won't be such asshole employers like corporate suits.
• public library?: May be comfy for bookworms, but also stressful at times (dealing with people and computers).
• simple manual jobs: E.g. helping out at some small farm, construction (for those who want to work out), handicraft, moving furniture, ...
• shepherd: You might be able to get hired to live in the wild with a herd of sheep, just look after them and protect them from wolves.
• some kind of very specific old timey service: In very specific places, probably far away from civilization and/or in some less developed country, it might be possible to do something like in old times, for example be a ferryman, or be the guy who carries supplies to restaurants in the mountains (this profession actually exists).
• ...

What to avoid: mainly work for corporations, office jobs, jobs in big cities, working with people and computers, anything with responsibility and high salary, shitty, unhealthy and dangerous environments such as factories, unethical shit (supporting copyright, capitalism, consumerism, ...).

See Also

• antiwork
• NEET
• making living

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